How does aggressive deals with interpersonal conflict

New managers can start to make these decisions by identifying healthy conflict and confrontation. Ashira Prossack , Millennial and Gen Z Engagement expert, recommends keeping a finger on the pulse of the office to look for noticable changes in employee moods. A few signs to look for include:.

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Disengaged employees checking out of certain projects. Conflicting employees, not having a team leader to calm them down, may build seemingly minor disagreements to the point where one person or both considers quitting.

Plus, over time, facts fade away. The sooner conflict is addressed, the better. That said, not every conflict will quickly rage out of control. Some may grow over time, without many workers noticing. The difference between them is that one is a hot conflict and one is a cold conflict, Mark Gerzon , author of Leading through Conflict and president of Mediators Foundation, explains. Hot conflict is obvious. It cannot be kept under control and involves yelling, name calling, with the threat of physical violence.

Employees feel like they have been pushed to the edge. Cold conflict often flies under the radar. It involves cold shoulders, exclusion and passive aggressive behavior. While you may need to wait for a heated conflict to cool down, resolving a cold conflict can feel like moving a glacier. There are weeks possibly months and years of resentment formed in layers over a cold conflict, and it will be hard to solve the problems between these employees with just one mediation session.

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Your employees need to feel comfortable coming to you with problems. If they are handling a situation improperly, you want them to feel comfortable approaching you about it. Some managers dismiss conflict and lead employees to hide their problems instead. Your employee might simply be looking for someone to talk to before they solve the problem on their own anyway.

Wood advises managers to listen for as long as they feel comfortable, and to really try to make team members feel heard. This will increase their trust in you, which means they will be more likely to follow your advice or take action on any solutions you provide. One of the most important factors when listening to your employees is remaining objective. Most people want to work in a conflict-free environment.

Listening to third parties can help you come up with objective views of the problem that leads to a solution. As you gain experience, and your employees work with you longer, you may be able to step back more often. If the problem cannot be fully solved, then a compromise must be reached that everyone involved is happy with. This is one of the hardest things to enforce when resolving a conflict.

How can aggressive/bully deals with interpersonal conflict

People feel the need to interrupt the other speaker when they believe that they are being maligned or misspoken of. They feel the need to defend themselves and this often manifests as an interruption that will often cause even more conflict. Jumping to conclusions or making assumptions about one or both parties involved in a conflict can make it nearly impossible to find an acceptable solution. Instead, allow each person involved to express themselves however they see fit and simply move on from there.

No matter how dramatic the conflict, you should always be able to find some form of common ground. It could be related the conflict or it could be something as far-removed as a mutual hate for a single sports team. Focus on these pieces of common ground as a foundation for finding a solution to the conflict at hand. Conflicts should not be looked upon as competitions, where one person has to win and the other is left with nothing. The conflict should be resolved to the satisfaction of both parties. If one party is left unsatisfied, then nothing has been resolved.

This is where compromise will become essential and should be encouraged and embraced where possible.

Reduce Stress With Increased Assertiveness

When it comes to interpersonal conflict, there is no room for your opinion on the conflict. The only thing that should be considered are the facts resolving the incidents. Opinions are too changeable and cannot be relied upon as a source of information for conflict resolution. While this might seem a little counterintuitive, it is important to walk away from a situation if you are angry. Nothing can be accomplished through anger and if one or both parties are furious, all that will be achieved is more conflict.

Remove yourself until you are able to calm down enough to have a rational conversation. In those cases, peer mediation is sometimes the best option. Peer mediation is defined as two or more individuals meeting in private to resolve a dispute while being assisted by a trained peer mediator. Females are supposed to be less directly aggressive than males, because direct aggression is considered inappropriate behavior for the feminine gender role.

This may also explain another result of the Ingram et al. Girls were less likely to talk about responding to conflict with physical aggression, and talked more about feeling sad about the conflict and about conflicts in friendships.

Passive-Aggressive Relationships and You - One to One

The girls' narrations might be influenced, however, by gender role appropriateness in the situation where they were interviewed by the researcher. Previous empirical research has revealed, however, that a part of the female population is masculine or undifferentiated Frank, McLaughlin, and Crusco, ; Hoffman and Fidell, ; Johnson and Black, ; Jones and Lamke, ; Long, ; Wong, Kettlewell, and Sproule, ; Woodhill and Samuels, Masculine or undifferentiated females are less influenced by feminine gender role expectations and, thus, the social sanction model is only partly applicable to Ingram et al.

A third interpretative position may arise from the evolutionary significance of female health. Reproduction is a fundamental factor for species survival, and the good somatic and psychological health of females is a key precondition for successful mating. The maintenance of good female somatic and psychological health is also very important for quality investment in any existing offspring. Females who are less exposed to aggressive signals are less stressed and, therefore, more relaxed for potential courtship and for successful mating.

The more frequent targeting of anger towards males could be beneficial for the preservation of female somatic and psychological health. Conflict encounters including the externalization of anger may sometimes escalate to serious physical combats. Risk of physical combat with males may be perceived as more threatening by females, and it may elicit higher levels of stress in females.

This explanation is supported by the results of our recent study.

  • Gender Differences in Human Interpersonal Conflicts: A Reply to!
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This explanation of the gender-specific targeting of anger towards males is also consistent with the parental investment theory Campbell, ; Trivers, Fourth, the more frequent targeting of anger towards males could be also related to the frequent conflicts of males within the dominance hierarchy. The male's functioning within the dominance hierarchy is probably connected with the frequent negotiations of rank by way of regular interpersonal conflicts, as well as serious physical combats with other males during hominid evolution.

One's rank in the male dominance hierarchy also influences the rate of access to females, and thus represents an important factor for successful reproduction. The male's mind as well as body is therefore supposed to be well-equipped for the perception of aggressive signals. Females may simply utilize this higher resilience of males for venting their own stress and excessive tensions. This explanation is supported by the threat model, where males are supposed to be tuned in to potential threats, as well as to be ready to respond aggressively to threats Richardson and Green, Apart from the above-mentioned explanations, I can also mention an alternative view, which is in opposition to the previous line of reasoning.

The expression of anger is mostly regarded as a conflictive emotion that harms group harmony and social interactions. However, in some cases, appropriate expressions of anger can be also beneficial for an interpersonal relationship because of the restoration of balance that has been previously disturbed Pellegrini, ; Rieffe and Terwogt, From this perspective, naturally expressed anger may better settle conflict situations, and it may also reduce interpersonal stress during the development of a social relationship. In any case, Ingram et al. Such reformulated theoretical rationale is also supported by several previous studies.

For example, in the study of Fisher and Evers , females reported more anger suppressions and less anger expressions than males, whereas males reported more direct expressions of anger. Also, in Western societies, there is a general expectation that males usually express their anger more often than females Fabes and Martin, ; Hess, Blairy, and Kleck, ; Johnson and Shulman, ; Plant, Kling, and Smith, More frequent anger suppressions in females may be related to the relatively high costs of overt anger expressions. The energy costs of various facial expressions were analyzed in my previous study Trnka, Facial expressions of anger, laughter, and surprise were considered to be expensive in comparison to other facial expressions.

The paper of Ingram et al. The above-mentioned comments are intended to provide an additional source of inspiration for future research. Also, there are more related issues that have not been discussed in the present commentary; for example, gender differences in the frequencies of overt anger expressions in relation to the efficiency of conflict-solving skills.

Such issues may be inspiring for future discussions about gender differences in interpersonal conflicts, as well as in the experience and the expression of anger. Many thanks to Karel Balcar, Martin Kuska, and Jitka Lindova for their valuable comments during the preparation of the manuscript. Skip to main content. Evolutionary Psychology. Article Menu.